My last post was in error....

After receiving an letter from my father this week, it appears that my perception of our visit together was much different than his... He misinterpreted some things that I said to him during our visit, and instead of asking me to clarify, made his own assumptions about what I meant and became very angry. I tried to call him to straighten things out, but it didn't seem to be very effective. I wrote him a long letter in response; now I'll just have to wait to see if I receive a reply. I guess that things haven't changed after all....

The kids meet my dad

We had a nice surprise in the beginning of February. My father called and said that he would be travelling through town in route to attend a reunion with his Air Force buddies, and he and Bobbie were planning to spend a couple days in Orlando so that they could meet the kids. My close friends know that my relationship with my father has been very strained at times. We come from the opposite end of the spectrum when it comes to political and philosophical issues. I am very liberal and he is quite conservative. I am very open and quick to show my emotions, he has a hard time talking about or displaying his feelings. In the past, this has led to hurt feelings on both sides. There were a few very bad arguments that left us so at odds that we didn't speak for several years; we'd connect again and try to make things work, but then have another falling out and more years of lost time. Because of this, despite my invitation, he had never decided to come and meet my family. I sent him some pictures after the kids were born, and we exchanged a few Christmas cards over the years (between our arguments and estranged periods) but there had been no face-to-face contact between my father and I since 1996, when Sean & I had stopped by his home for breakfast on our way home from visiting Rene in Boone.


I think that it bothered both of us, but we couldn't seem to make our relationship work. So when I got his call about coming to meet the family, I was excited, but also scared that things would go poorly again. But my fears were unfounded. The visit was as nice as it could have possibly been, and my children really adored both him and Bobbie.


We met them for dinner on Thursday night, 2/5; but that visit was rather brief, because they were exhausted after getting up at 3am to drive down from NC. Thankfully, they decided to come down the following day to watch the kids as they participated in their homeschool bowling league, and then we went to the Altamonte Mall, where the kids played in the play area and Bobbie, Daddy & I had an opportunity to talk a bit. Later, we went upstairs for dinner at the Elephant Bar restaurant, where Sean met up with us as soon as he finished work. Even though the kids had just met them, the boys especially felt very comfortable. Dakota talked their ears off; and at the restaurant, when Aiden got tired, Bobbie was kind enough to offer her lap for a pillow and he took a happy nap stretched across his chair with his head in her lap. On the way home, Aiden said how sweet she was and how much he loved her. Of course, since Anevay has just turned 2, she is at the stranger-danger stage, which prevented her from feeling confident enough to go up to them herself, but she would tolerate me holding her beside them.


We have plans to go up to see Christine and Rene in NC this summer, and Bobbie and Daddy invited us to stop by their home to see them also. We are looking forward to it so much. I hope that it will be the start of a closer relationship between all of us. I am sad that we have missed so many years and hope that we can find some common middle ground that will enable us to feel comfortable together in the future. My kids already do; I guess I just need to follow their lead.

Here are a few pictures I got. They aren't that great, but I was too distracted to take many. I hope that the next visit we have together will be more relaxed for all of us. I feel better about our relationship than I have in years.

Daddy & Dakota

Anevay isn't so sure about Daddy yet.

Daddy and Bobbie; still happy together after more than 25 years.

Aiden was still feeling a little shy at this point, but that soon changed.

Just before we all said, "Good-bye."

The kids are growing too fast!

Little Anevay is really growing fast these days. She has started talking in short sentences. She loves to mimic what the rest of us do. She will copy me and cup her little hands around her mouth to call out "Come on, boys!" She is very good about saying, "Fank oooh" (aka Thank you) when you give her anything, and "Peas!" when she wants something. I came through the house calling for her yesterday and she stepped out from under the table and said, "I white he-uh!" (I'm right here!) Peek-a-boo is still her favorite game.

She has the cutest little twisty-butt running gait that just makes you giggle to see. Her cloth diaper just amplifies the effect, because it is so big and cushy. Sometimes, she'll be calling out, "I wunning! I wunning!" She loves to look at books and is getting better about chewing on them or ripping out pages; it still happens occasionally, but not nearly as often as it did a couple months ago.

Anevay does this little rolling her eyes move that she picked up from Aiden, and after she does it she makes this mischevious little grin that is so cute it melts your heart. She loves to cause trouble, like walking up to the TV and turning it off in the middle of a program that someone is watching. The boys will howl in frustration and she will just grin and revel in her power.

Anevay is developing other, more helpful ways. She is starting to learn to use the potty; not consistently mind you, it will be quite some time before we say goodbye to diapers, but she loves to climb up on the potty and tinkle; then she joins me in clapping for herself. She's only done #2 a couple times on the potty, but she's realizing what the potty is for anyway. Sometimes, she even gets up out of bed and opens the bathroom door, calling out, "Potty! Potty!" She still needs help completing the process, but she's on her way.

She has learned that the statement "I need you!" brings a prompt response, so she uses it often. She will say any of our names, followed by I need you! It is so cute. She hasn't really figured out that her toys or other belongings can't respond to her commands and come running like the rest of us. When she can't locate it, she will call out to her stuffed Dora doll, "Dora, I need you!" and fully expect the doll to come out of hiding and run over to her. She will call her shoes the same way. A couple days ago, we were in the Target store and she saw some stuffed horse toys in the Valentine display. She cupped her little hands around her mouth and cried out, "Hossies! Hossies! I neeed you!" while reaching out so that they might jump into her arms as she sat in the stroller. The boys and I couldn't help laughing, then of course we handed her what she wanted, so I guess we are not helping her learn that toys don't actually come when you call.

Here's a few recent pictures of her:

Playing on the playground with her very best girlfriend, Brianna.

Getting into mischief is my specialty!

Precious from every angle as she looks at her reflection in a double mirror.
Peek-a-boo!

Aiden is quite the character these days. He and Dakota both love to read and one of their favorites are Garfield comics. I guess that he has read "sigh" lots of times there, because now, when he's being asked to do something that he isn't enthusiastic about, he puts his hand up to his forehead, rolls his eyes and says, "Sigh!" It is so cute and silly.


Aiden often astonishes me with things that he has learned; he is a very intelligent child. He loves to read everything and has started enjoying sounding out words to spell. He loves the computer & Leapster educational programs. I think that he could be an unschooler; he seems to have a passion for learning without needing much prompting.


Aiden is quite moody; I guess being the middle child is hard. He is no longer the baby, but he's still not big enough to be able to be in control of much. So he exerts his power where he can; like in being uncooperative about staying at the table to eat dinner, or being the slowest creature on the planet when it comes to putting on his seat belt, or his shoes, etc. And it is very hard to get him to smile in a picture; he seems to take great pleasure in frowning while everyone else is smiling. I have to catch him in candid moments to get a smile; posed pictures end up with an angry expression most often. I hope this behavior passes quickly.


Aiden and Dakota bicker so much, but Aiden still wants to copy everything that Dakota does. Most often, when Dakota chooses something to eat or drink, Aiden decides that he wants the same. They chose the same pack of "Pirate" Valentine cards to give their friends, etc. His mimicing behavior amuses Dakota sometimes, and annoys the mess out of him at others. I wish with all my hear that they could just get along, but I guess that is expecting the impossible.

Here's some recent pictures of Aiden:

. A very happy moment at bowling.

Having fun at the park.

Showing off the towering sculpture he created.

Dakota will be hitting double-digits next month; he's turning 10. That is hard to believe. He is a really special little boy and he tries to be a big help so often. He loves to play with Anevay & be the protective big brother. But he also loves to torment the heck out of Aiden, so much that I often get very angry about it. He wants to be the boss, and quite often, Aiden will go along with it, letting Dakota say just how they will play, down to what Aiden's character will say and/or do. As long as things are going that way, everything is fine. But when Aiden gets more independent and wants to do things his own way, the bickering often starts.

Dakota told me last week that he was getting a mustache. He came in smiling and pointing at his upper lip and there actually is a tiny bit of dark peach fuzz there. That is just not right. My little boy can't be getting ready to start puberty. He pointed out that he has already had pimples, so it stands to reason that he is now getting facial hair. He was pleased that I found such documentation of him actually growing up to be a distressing thing. I reminded him that I hadn't given him permission to grow up yet and that I wanted him to stay little for at least a few more years, but he just giggled and said the I really didn't have any control over it; he was getting bigger and that was that.

Dakota loves his pets and really wants more; right now he has 2 toads, (Hip-Hop is the boy and Jasmine is the girl) and the gerbils (his is named Geronimo and Aiden's is Tannie; both boys). We have been looking into what sort of dog to get when Nakita passes on; we want the next one to be smaller, so that it can live in the house with us. Dakota used to be pretty badly allergic to dogs, but he seems to be getting better. We met with a fellow homeschool mom who works with a local pug rescue organization a few days ago, to let Dakota play with some pugs and see if they set off his allergies. He sneezed a bit, but not nearly as bad as he used to, and didn't seem to have the itchy eyes that have plagued him in the past. We may consider adopting a homeless pug - but I'm not sure yet. I've always been a fan of mixed breeds and appreciate their hardier natures. Dakota wants another dog, but he also begs for fish and various reptiles, also. He has certainly inherited the love of animals that most of both Sean's & my family posess.

Here's a few recent pictures of Dakota:

He loves climbing trees.


Dakota created this Valentine card at our homeschool Valentine party to be delivered to some lonely nursing home residents.

Dakota proudly displays the frog that he created with the Wedgit building toys. He actually followed directions to make it! This thrilled me to no end, since following directions isn't one of his strongest skills.



That's all for now...I will post some pics of my Dad's visit in the next couple days.

Looking back on 2008

As we start blazing in to 2009, I wanted to take a few minutes to think back on some of the fun that we had last year. It was fun to watch baby Anevay as she learned to talk and walk. Her first steps were bittersweet, since they happened at our dear friend's home, the Shewfelts, when we were over there to say goodbye before they moved up to NC at the end of July. Here are some shots of the big event:

We were sad have to adjust to so much space between our friends; they have been such a major part of our homeschooling journey and we've really enjoyed learning and playing together over the years. We really felt the loss as August brought us back to the business of serious homeschool lesson work again. Since Dakota really hates learning from workbooks, I've tried to transition to more hands-on learning opportunities this year. He does seem to be retaining more information and feeling more enjoyment with the process, but it exhausts me because we are on the go to some sort of enrichment activity all the time. Here are a few shots of some field trips and learning co-ops that we enjoyed:

Science Center activities:

Holding their edible Olympic torches after learning about Greece:

Learning about Australia at the library:

A few of the field trips:

We took an all-too-brief trip up to see the Shewfelts at the end of August. It was great to see them. We also got to see Aunt Nay, who came to spend the day with us as we toured Linville Caverns and then played in a beautiful mountain stream. This was the first time that Anevay got to meet her. Here are some pictures from that trip:

October brought more great family time. Sean's sister, Bevan, moved to Washington state about 2 years ago and we have really missed seeing her and her husband, Jody. They have always been so kind and loving to the kids, but they moved just before Anevay was born. Dakota has spent countless hours on the phone talking to Bevan; she is a really great aunt and never makes him feel like he's bothering her. Well, Bevan and Jody came back for a visit; but sadly Jody had to work. At least we were able to see Bevan, though. We had a wonderful day with her at Aunt Patience and Uncle Bob's home. And to make it even better, Grandma and Grandpa, Aunt Susie and Uncle Keith as well as my sister, Rita, also came over. Here are some pictures from that day:

Since this was an election year, we had a good opportunity to do some in-depth Civics lessons. We are a passionately political family, so the election process is important to us and we got involved by watching the debates as a family, discussing the candidates positions on issues that are important to us, reading articles, attending rallies and even canvassing door-to-door on election day. The kids may be too young to vote yet, but they still felt empowered by seeing the candidates in person and by canvassing for Obama. Here's some pictures from the rally in Orlando, where Barack appeared with Hillary:

There were lots of other great things that happened for our family last year, but I'm already posting too many pictures, so I'll stop. I look forward to more happy memories that we will create in 2009!